topic New parent anxiety in Anxiety

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Wed, 20 Feb 2019 11:57:15 GMT

We found out a little while ago that my partner and I are expecting our first baby later this year. How exciting right?? We’re getting to that time now we can tell people, also fun and exciting but also really daunting.

I’ve had generalised anxiety for quite a while now, been getting it under control the last little while but this pregnancy is definitely bringing a spike, quite a bit. Anyone have any experience in how to cope with this, it’s different anxiety to what I’m used to if that makes sense....

Its super super exciting, but also super super scary 😬

Had a scan today actually, I just couldn’t believe what I was looking at, a real human being, OUR human being, and he/she was not a total blob like I expected, like

mind = blown. It actually looked like a baby, I did not go in thinking that’s what I would see.

Still can’t beleive it.

New parent anxiety

blondguy — Wed, 20 Feb 2019 12:34:43 GMT

My heartfelt congratulations to you and your partner Jackson 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

You make perfect sense....when my daughter was born I also felt the same as I had GAD at the time too...My mind was a mess....Up and down and everywhere....

Even a dad without GAD would be super exited and super scared too.....This is a major life event so please dont be too hard on yourself with overthinking this beautiful time in your (and your partners) life

Having GAD (anxiety) means we are somewhat overstimulated and can 'react' or overthink more than we should with any life event.....which you know anyway Jackson

So you can enjoy this beautiful time in your life without being overwhelmed by any 'overthinking' please make a double appointment with your doc (GP!) and have a good talk about how you feel. You will feel better!!

You are a super strong guy Jackson....I know that you can have a chat to a GP....it can be a huge bonus to take the 'edge' off the scary part you mentioned in these early stages.....You have nothing to lose and everything to gain Jackson 🙂

Your thoughts are always appreciated Jackson

Congratulations again to you and your partner Jackson 🙂 !!!!

Woohooo!!! (Please be 'Gentle' to yourself)

Paul

New parent anxiety

baet123 — Wed, 20 Feb 2019 22:36:51 GMT

Hey Jackson,

Congratulations to you and your partner. This is amazing news and a big year ahead for you, no doubt!

I myself have never had kids but I imagine how happy you must be. Being able to tell people you are bringing a little one into the world with your partner is a wonderful thing! At the same time, I could imagine how daunting it must be particularly knowing you and your partner will be responsible for something so precious and that your child will be relying on you and that is daunting for most people, let alone for someone who suffers from GAD and the like.

It is extremely positive that you have had it under control for a while now and it is absolutely understandable that the pregnancy may have an impact on your overall anxiety and the way you are feeling at present. This is completely normal and it is best that you consider seeking professional assistance or discussing these concerns so that you may have a action plan or a plan in place if you start to feel considerably overwhelmed to the point where it is impacting your quality of life and well-being.

Enjoy the process and the journey and I know that you are going to be an awesome parent! It is extremely obvious you are so excited and cannot wait to be a parent and I can tell that you are going to do an awesome job.

All the best and keep us posted mate.

Nick.

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Thu, 21 Feb 2019 07:49:22 GMT

Thank you, both of you really it means a lot.

I’ve been skateboarding a lot, more than usual and that’s helped. Also my work has an EAP which I spoke to today during lunch as I’m not actively seeing a professional right now I thought that would help.

New parent anxiety

blondguy — Fri, 22 Feb 2019 09:08:34 GMT

Hey Jackson

Skateboarding!! Now thats an excellent idea as an anxiety reducer......Physical exertion....Yes!!

You are a serious legend Mr J (thumbs up!)

Are you and your partner getting an ultrasound later on...or keeping it a surprise?

Really super happy for you Jackson!!!

You Rock

Paul

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Fri, 22 Feb 2019 09:21:12 GMT

Hey Paul we are yet to decide (or make an agreement/compromise on that haha). I want to find out but H is set on a suprise, I think i’ll have to for go what I want in this instance haha. But we still have a little time to decide 👀

New parent anxiety

blondguy — Fri, 22 Feb 2019 09:24:14 GMT

Absolutely J

I guess Im excited...

oops...lol

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Fri, 22 Feb 2019 09:28:52 GMT

And the thing is I know people who one has found out and not the other but I couldn’t keep it a secret, no way, I’m the worst at that haha

me too, Paul, me too, scared but excited too

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Fri, 22 Feb 2019 09:31:05 GMT

my mates would give me crap for this but I had an RDO today so I went to the baby shop just for a look at the stuff haha, they were like do you need a hand you look lost? I was like nah just looking thanks

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Fri, 22 Feb 2019 09:45:38 GMT

Also I had no idea baby stuff went that small

New parent anxiety

blondguy — Fri, 22 Feb 2019 10:01:53 GMT

You just made me laugh out loud J....(with you...not at you) I really needed a laugh by the way....Thanks heaps!!

You are spot on.....the baby stuff still gets to me....so tiny and super cute!

You have an amazing attitude Jackson

and yes being scared is very very common.....you are not alone there!

Jackson >>>>> Legend 🙂

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Fri, 22 Feb 2019 10:20:59 GMT

I called my mum while I was in the shop, she said to me yeah.... you know you were that small one day?? Yeah I know that mum but that’s still so small haha. We’ll be telling our respective work places next week so that’s daunting, one of my coworkers knows but that’s it and he said to me mate it’s only scary and a big deal if you make it that, just be chill, it’s not like he (our boss) will be upset, it’s good news.

So, chill I shall be.

New parent anxiety

blondguy — Sun, 24 Feb 2019 07:51:51 GMT

Hey Jay

Your coworker is a legend when he mentioned "it’s only scary and a big deal if you make it that, just be chill, it’s not like he (our boss) will be upset, it’s good news"

You have great people around you Jackson 🙂

Paul

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Sun, 24 Feb 2019 11:11:04 GMT

Yep, I’m pretty lucky that way, I guess that’s one of the benefits in working in the area I’m working in, everyone supports each other really well, you’ve got to have each other’s backs. I met with my boss every 3 weeks as an arrangement, to check in, so our next one is this week so i’ll be bringing it up then, I think for me that’s a lot easier than having to approach him myself.

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Wed, 27 Feb 2019 12:21:48 GMT

All done, that was so much easier than I imagined 🐣

New parent anxiety

smallwolf — Wed, 27 Feb 2019 23:23:15 GMT

Very quick story for you ...

Before our first son was born bought a couple of book about looking after babies/kids etc. A day or so after the baby was born we threw out the books. Nothing in them worked (for us) and we muddled our way through the raising them from 0 to now. I am sure you will both be good parents. And don't worry if there is a mess in the house... part of "fun" of having kids.

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Thu, 28 Feb 2019 11:01:35 GMT

smallwolf

thanks for that little tip, just because it’s in a book doesn’t mean its going work for everyone. Some people are very by the book, others are the opposite and that’s fine. We’ll just take it day by day, very basic needs in the beginning, demanding but very basic. We do have a little while though.

We’ve decide we are going to find out, but we both keep changing our minds on it so that might change ha

New parent anxiety

quirkywords — Thu, 28 Feb 2019 21:22:18 GMT

Jackson,

firstly congratulations.

it is very confusing with all the books, social media advice and advice from friends and family that one gets that starts from when one becomes pregnant and maybe never ends!!

My mum told me when I was reading a few books, to “ remember that the baby has not read the books!”

That really helped when my baby did not behave like the books said she should!!

Also if you find just one person or book, or source you trust and then filter out the rest. people are well meaning but it becomes overwhelming at times.

my children are older than you and I still worry about the way I parent.

All the best

Quirky

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Fri, 01 Mar 2019 04:19:53 GMT

Thanks so much Quirky

New parent anxiety

Jackson1994 — Sat, 13 Jul 2019 11:43:54 GMT

Just an update for anyone reading along, our due date is next month but for health reasons as there has been a few complications H is getting induced a little early. We have been given a date which we have only been sharing with the people closest to us just in case it changes etc, but at this rate we will be holding our little monkey at the end of the July. We will know more as we get closer and have some more appointments.

And we don’t know what we are having, but I think it’s a boy.

Have a lovely weekend