topic Losing the fight in Anxiety

Losing the fight

happyannie — Mon, 13 Mar 2017 12:45:52 GMT

Hi I just needed to tell someone how Im really feeling. My anxiety is crippling me Im so anxious about everything. I worry all the time that something bad is going to happen, such a feeling of dread and despair. I do mindful breathing and try to stay calm, but lately nothing seems to help. I know my anxiety is not helping me with my depression.

I also have agoraphobia I only leave the house to see my Doctors, I have a fear about leaving my house, I dont have friends, my husband is my full time carer, I have a daughter who works full time, and I have panic attacks when she leaves, it all comes back to me worrying that something bad will happen.

My Mum died from Motor Neurons Disease then I lost my brother then 11 months later my Dad passed away, so the only family I have now is my husband and daughter, sometimes I feel I cant breath, my body gets tight and tense.

Im just having a hard time at the moment, I feel like a whinger

Thanx for letting me vent

Annie

Losing the fight

blondguy — Mon, 13 Mar 2017 12:54:22 GMT

Hi Annie

always good to see you.

Im sorry that you are still going through this dark period and the tragic loss of your parents

We spoke before about doctors counseling ages ago. I used to have mild agoraphobia and chronic anxiety too....

The severity of anxiety attacks do decrease over time especially with counseling 🙂

You are not whingeing at all Annie....no worries at all..

Can I ask how often you are seeing your GP?

you are not alone here Annie

Paul

Losing the fight

happyannie — Mon, 13 Mar 2017 13:05:00 GMT

Hi Paul

Thank you for replying to my post. I see my GP every 3 weeks,I see my psychiatrist and psychologist every 2 weeks.

I just feel at the moment nothing is working for me.

I have great medical support but sometimes it doesnt feel enough.

Thanx

Annie

Losing the fight

blondguy — Mon, 13 Mar 2017 13:24:05 GMT

Thanks for posting back Annie and good to see you 🙂

You are doing everything spot on....especially the regular visits!

The anxiety will lessen in intensity but it does take time and patience (unfortunately)

Having had these awful anxiety attacks I understand how severe they can be Annie

If your GP has recommended taking meds your anxiety will decrease. The anti anxiety meds are not a 'fix all' but they will provide you with a solid platform on which the counseling will be more effective and thus you will have greater peace of mind than you do now

If your GP thinks that anti anxiety meds may help, You will have some peace 🙂

my kindest

Paul

Losing the fight

happyannie — Tue, 20 Jun 2017 06:41:03 GMT

Im really battling today and have been for the last couple of months, Im so depressed Ive been told Im in a depressive phase which feels like its never ending. My meds have been put up but its not making any difference, I still dont want to get up in the morning and have been sleeping throughout the day. I just cant find joy in anything at the moment. Ive been depressed for many years but nothing like Ive been feeling lately. I have great family support and great medical care. I was just wondering if anyone has any ideas to help me through this phase. I meditate, do mindful breathing and generally try to stay calm, but all I want to do is scream.

Anyway thanx for listening BB

Annie

Losing the fight

MarkJT — Tue, 20 Jun 2017 07:10:16 GMT

Hey Annie, great to see you back on the forums.

Sorry to hear that you are having further battles. As you have outlined, you have great support, deep breath and are on meds so you are doing a lot of things right.

I know it is hard to get outside, but do you think you may be able to get some exercise in? If you cannot get outside, there are plenty of ways to get you daily exercise inside. You can use YouTube and follow some exercise programs on there.

Exercise is such a powerful anti depressant and it helped me so much when i was in my darker days. I ran and ran and ran and it worked wonders.

How about your diet? How is that? Can you improve it? There is a lot of material about now that says gut health is so important to your mental health. The next time you are at the GP's, perhaps ask about how get good gut health and maintain it.

As i said first up, really glad that you have come back to the forums. You will have heaps of support here and more than happy to discuss things further.

Hope to hear back.

Mark.

Losing the fight

Croix — Tue, 20 Jun 2017 07:34:20 GMT

Dear Annie~

I saw you post, and your about going though a very bad time with your anxiety, depression and agoraphobia. I'm not sure what to say about the depression, mine has been helped by meds, psychiatrists and by hospitalization, and you are already addressing the medical front, so I'll leave that side of things.

Anxiety is really crippling as you know, and unfortunately the worse it gets the less it responds to the regular things that can help relieve it. For example I read a lot for distraction, normally works well, however when things are bad I don't have enough patience.

I find that most of my strategies involve some form of distraction - combined with as healthy a lifestyle as I can mange. When at my worst it is a change of environment, presence of other people and doing things involving some level of physical moment that I find most effective.

I understand you have difficulty leaving the house, this is a pity as going for a walk can be very helpful. An alternative might be introducing something new, an exercise bike and DVD to watch perhaps?

Do you have any pets? Grooming and taking care of them can be pretty engrossing and also rather soothing. I've two cats and a dog which keep my wife and I pretty busy - they are a demanding lot.

Another thing that keeps thoughts at bay is to try to harness one's creative side. Many here play an instrument, paint or draw. I try to write short passages about events in my past (nice ones). This has the added advantage of taking my mind back to happy times.

Looking round these Forums may help, I've gleaned a lot from

Forums/ Anxiety/ SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING ANXIETY

which is very long but has an awful lot of things others have found helpful.

In passing I see you practice mindful breathing, I use the app Smiling Mind which steers me into concentrating enough to enter another sort of state - takes practice though.

I do hope you come back and say what you think, hopefully there is something here in this post of help, if not sing out and others may have fresh ideas.

Croix

Losing the fight

happyannie — Tue, 20 Jun 2017 09:37:21 GMT

Thanx Mark for replying to my post. I try to exercise daily all indoor exercises as I dont like to leave the house. I also have a yoga ball which Im addicted to lol.

My diet is not the greatest as I have a very small appetite and watch what I eat. I suffer with bad migraines at least once a week which is really debilitating.

I just have to try and stay as positive as I can.

Once again thanx for your reply and suggestions

Annie

Losing the fight

happyannie — Tue, 20 Jun 2017 09:54:06 GMT

Thanx for the reply Croix

I do daily exercises inside on my yoga ball. Sometimes my husband will take me for a walk on a rare good day. Outside world is very scary to me. Its very difficult for me.

I dont have cats or a dog but I do have a pet diamond dove bird who is the love of my life shes so cute and shes wonderful therapy for me.

I got the Smiling Mind app about a month ago and absolutely love it and use it on a daily basis, its really helpful to me. I would recommend it to everyone. It does take a bit to get used to but once you get used to it its great. I also keep a daily journal which I find very helpful, Ive been keeping journals for the last couple of years , I find it very relaxing to write my thoughts down.

Once again thanx for replying to my post and your advise

Annie

Losing the fight

geoff — Tue, 20 Jun 2017 20:18:31 GMT

hello Annie, I'm so pleased that you have posted once again, that does mean that a lot of the work we try and do to assist people is working, but unfortunately it doesn't necessarily mean that you're feeling any better now, which I'm so sorry for, but what you have been through is what none of us would ever want to happen with us.
If the increase in your medication isn't working then I would be going back to your doctor and discuss you trying another AD, because if they are at maximum levels, then their effect isn't working.
If you feel strong enough then perhaps you could try altering your lifestyle, rather than staying in the same rut, where you know exactly what is going to happen everyday, but what's going to keep you feeling this way.
That's what I had to do to overcome my depression, turn a full circle and do what I thought I would never want to do, and what happened, it worked, it released me from depression, so I could then move on, but more so forward.
A little stimulus from doing something you haven't done before can be rather exciting. Geoff.

Losing the fight

cakeboss — Tue, 20 Jun 2017 20:55:15 GMT

Hi I know how you feel with anxiety .I am going through a stressful time at the moment until it is sorted out.I have good support network and im on medication and seeing counciler to control the over thinking where i think things are going to happen but havent yet.I was have had my medictation put up recently to cope with what im going through.I saw dr yesterday and she said take one day at a time.Because i already suffer anxiety depression my anxiety has lifted up over the top of it all .Its causing me to have severe panick attacks and its just horrible.Ive been given cds for relaxation im trying hard to do them.Isnt easy settling down from a anxiety attack.Just when you think you feel better it comes back.Dr said going up in my meds will take time to work .I find first thing in the morning my anxiety is there hard to settle .I have music on and are going to go to work today which is a distraction.Does anyone else have this problem under stress .

Losing the fight

demonblaster — Tue, 20 Jun 2017 21:40:16 GMT

Hi Annie 🙂 ((( hugs )))

Poor darl you're copping it hard in several ways atm aren't you.

Good on you for opening up. Don't at all feel like a whinger, you're definately not, you're expressing how you're feeling which alone can be helpful. We need to get stress out.

I read all the posts & these guys have some really good input.

I was going to suggest too excercise, as much as the motivation I imagine (know deep depression well) would probs be all time low it not only releases feel good chemicals (endorphines) it's also a fantastic stress release too which manifests if not released. Agree with an above post, at this stage not being able to get out restricts but various activities can be done at home.
Suggest don't go at it too hard to start else tiredness, soreness waking up sleeping muscles 🙂 can be a put off.
What about a beginners excercise DVD

Do you like music? Can be soothing. Music takes us back to memories I've found, maybe pick some stuff that you like that reminds you of good times in your life.
What about sticking on a dancy up beat tune or two & rip the floor up, I do that sometimes lately to David Bowie Let's Dance, helps. Dancing no matter how good or bad we are lol at home where we're comfy we can let rip without fear of judgement or criticism

In one of my darkest depressions (Bipolar- BP) I remember a time I was sitting in the chair completely smothered by Blackness, couldn't have felt lower for whatever reason I needed to go to the spare room & just that movement & temporary distraction lifted me slightly.
Distraction is imperative I'm learning if only to give ourselves temporary relief outta pain

Difficult I know but if you can try to remember good times in your life, allow yourself to smile & laugh which isn't how we're feeling I know but digging deep & finding memories are small steps but can make a dif.
By reminding yourself of those times can lift a bit & help believe you can be happy again hun. You can

Annie I know Motor Neuron very well, got very close to a man with it when I was nursing yrs ago.
Very sorry for your losses
How long ago darl?
I was wondering the feeling of dread of something happening to your daughter when she leaves, do you think that's because of the loss of family members? understandable. I too feel that way, my biggest fear is losing people I love & care about.
Think the best we can do on that is focus on good now time if any sense in that.

Let us know how you're going Annie

We do care 🙂

Losing the fight

MarkJT — Wed, 21 Jun 2017 00:45:55 GMT

Annie, that is great that you are exercising and yes also love a swiss ball!

May i ask why you do not like leaving the house? Anxiety driven?

Mark.

Losing the fight

blondguy — Wed, 21 Jun 2017 01:12:18 GMT

Hi Annie

Great to talk with you again. There are great posts above from gentle people that have had gone through similar dark phases in their lives too (me included of course) and are doing a lot better.

I used to have the problem of not leaving the house to back in the '80s. I remember how that felt. Its terrific you have family support and great medical care as well! Good on you Annie

The frequency of counseling has a huge impact on anxiety as well as depression. After I was 'stuck' in the house for about a week I had a community health mental health care worker see me weekly for 7 months...I didnt really like the thought of weekly visits but the frequency of the visits gave me my life back...

You have a great attitude Annie...Excellent 🙂

my kind thoughts for you

Paul

Losing the fight

happyannie — Wed, 21 Jun 2017 01:29:51 GMT

Hi Mark

I dont like leaving the house because I have a fear of what can happen for example car accident, fear of people, feelings that something bad can happen. I feel safe when Im at home. I only leave the house to go to appointments and the rituals I have to go through to leave the house is intense. I amworking on this problem in therapy so hopefully one day soon I can just grab my bag and leave the house. Positive thinking. Im trying.

Annie

Losing the fight

demonblaster — Wed, 21 Jun 2017 05:53:18 GMT

Mark Hi 🙂

Annie doesn't like leaving the house cause she suffers agrophobia. Phobia= fear , agora = open spaces or people or both Annie?
I've heard both

Was going to ask you about that if you don't mind talking about it.

Hope you don't mind me jumping in here 🙂

Go easy all

Losing the fight

MarkJT — Mon, 26 Jun 2017 09:13:22 GMT

Annie, my apologies for the delayed reply. I have friends that are like you and in my early days i was not good in public so know what you are saying.

It is great that you are working with your clinician on it. I do not know if your clinician has suggested it or you have mentioned it but would you be able to go out the front door and walk two steps past it, pause and when you get uncomfortable, head back inside. The next day go three steps, the next four steps etc. Again i must specify this, make sure that this is done in conjunction with your clinician.

An example for me was that I developed an instant fear of trains when i was diagnosed. Knowing that trains are a part of my life, I went to the station, put my headphones on with some great music (to distract the coming anxiety attack) and told myself that all i need to do is go one station.

I jumped on the train, which was almost empty and concentrated on my breathing. I was successful and made it one station and stayed on it for another one. I then got off and then returned to my home station. I was utterly exhausted after it but i conquored one small part of my demons.

I continued doing this for some time and even now, a few years on, I avoid packed trains, just cannot do them but for the most, I can do it.

Wonder if this kind of exercise would work for you?

Mark.

Losing the fight

demonblaster — Mon, 26 Jun 2017 23:25:26 GMT

Good for you Annie, like your positive thinking & great goal to reach hopping out of house without drama.

I was thinking same as Mark about taking couple steps each day. Baby steps, too much I imagine would be overwhelming.

Great achievement Mark with the music while on train. Bet you feel good about it. Can imagine it would have been exhausting but worth the effort aye.

Cyaz hope todays better for everyone