topic Health anxiety? in Anxiety

Health anxiety?

Mummybee — Wed, 04 Nov 2015 05:34:43 GMT

Hello everyone,

I am new to posting here.

I think I am getting health anxiety...

i have always been prone to panic attacks followed by periods of anxiety, but usually just situational, and as soon as the issue I'm worried about is resolved the anxiety fades and I go back to my usual self.

the problem this time is that it's my health I'm worried about and I'm scared that's making me find symptoms that aren't there and I will never escape this!

it started when I had some foggy brain and when to the Drs about it. He said he wanted to do an MRI after my blood tests came back all clear just to make sure there wasn't anything sinister going on, and that's when I panicked. I'm a 32 yo mother of two young children and between the time he said I needed the MRI and when I saw him again I had convinced myself I had MS or a brain tumour or something that would kill me.

when I rang for the results the receptionist told me that my dr wanted to see me regarding the results and I went into full panic attack. I couldn't breath, my heart was pounding my ears ringing I couldn't move my legs or arms... I made it to the doctors with some help from my mum and was told he just wanted me to see an eye dr as the MRI radiologist had queried a slightly larger optical nerve. No tumours no signs of anything nasty. But my muscles were so weak from the panic attack and it just won't go away, so now I'm so wound up and sick with worry about my muscles and why they are twitching like crazy and feel weak. This was three weeks ago and I'm still weak and twitching and can't get back to my dr until next week.

i thought posting on here might help take my mind off it for a while and hear other people's experience with health anxiety.

when I went to the eye dr my optical nerve was fine and my vision perfect but they did find slight changes suggesting cataracts. Cataracts at 32!! So now I have dr googled myself into being sick about the diseases I must have underlying to have cataracts at 32!

thanks for listening.

I'm so worried about not being around to watch my kids grow up 😞

Health anxiety?

Jacko777 — Thu, 05 Nov 2015 01:18:36 GMT

Hi mummybee,

Welcome to the Beyond Blue forums, I am glad you are talking about this, it sounds like it's been a challenging time. I am sure there will be others on here who have similar experiences and will have support and advice.

I am glad you can get to your Doc next week and meanwhile I hope you can find some ways to reduce your anxiety. If I am stressed out for too long I get migraines. They have been great motivation for me to reduce negative thoughts which I had to cut out or suffer bad. So you could presume that everything is going to be okay until you know otherwise, this will take practice. Whenever you notice that you are having negative thoughts, try and switch to something positive, you need positive diversions to give your mind a break.

There is an old saying...all unhappiness is caused by a chord that is yet to sound or a chord that stopped ringing long ago. We don't want to lose our energy to something that may never happen, we need that energy to get through the days, conserve your energy, practice positive thinking and gratitude for the health you have right now. All the best.

Jack

Health anxiety?

Moonstruck — Thu, 05 Nov 2015 01:37:12 GMT

Hello Mummybee......I am a first timer too....so haven't quite learned the rules yet....re "keeping the thread"...so I can't really say I have "Health Anxiety" but I am glad you've been able to express your fears and feelings...that is so important isn't it?...just to "get it out" to people who understand where you're coming from...re anxiety. After several traumatic events in last couple of weeks ( including 3 car breakdowns, the present one still not resolved)....my old "anxiety panic attacks feelings" have started to come back....and it's horrible. I feel this need to TALK.....and sometimes others don't fully get how incredibly UPSET you are.....about a car breaking down and how scary it is in heavy traffic etc....they brush it off "thats cars for you"...when alone at home today (I live alone) I am wasting a whole day...worrying, bursting into tears, shallow breathing, shaking, terrified that I will be too scared to drive far again...scared of borrowing a friend's car...scared I will damage it...scared my own car will break down the same way again...scared, scared, scared.....my logical, intelligent side (which others know me for) know I am "over reacting"......but it's so hard to tell my emotional side that!......Sorry folks for unburdening myself onto you with all this crap....I admire you all and wish you especially Mummybee..peace and love...xx

Health anxiety?

Jacko777 — Thu, 05 Nov 2015 01:58:06 GMT

Hi Moonstruck,

Welcome, you are having a rough day mate. Maybe take a few moments to sit down and do some breathing exercises, I do 4 seconds in, 4 seconds out, not too deep, I count in my head and tell my self R E L A X on the out breath. Thoughts will keep entering and that's okay, keep bringing your self back to the counting and watching your breath go in and out with your minds eye.

I guess anxiety can come from an underlying condition and/or from the way we are taught to respond to life. I found I had to change my program, from reacting to my life out of emotion, to respond to life from my heart, being true to my self. For me, it takes practice, the more times I switch from a negative thought to a positive one the more it becomes a natural mindset. I try to drop all emotion, I practice, it doesn't serve me, emotion to me comes from a mind that has not recovered from bad experiences. It's not what happens to you that counts, it's how you handle it, as they say. Calmness has to be taken, not given, I had to decide that calmness is mine and I will not let anyone or thing touch it, well I try! For me it's about conserving energy for the important parts of life, I presume their will be challenges and failures, it's how I respond to them that defines 'me'.

Unburden any time.

Jack

Health anxiety?

Moonstruck — Thu, 05 Nov 2015 03:53:35 GMT

Thank you Jacko777 - "emotion to me comes from a mind that has not recovered from bad experiences" - I know what you are getting at (I think) as I recognise that I "have not recovered from bad experiences"...some from quite a number of years ago.....one of the most untrue sayings, a fallacy is that "time heals all wounds".....No it doesn't. I don't agree. Time is just "time"....it's what we do with that time that heals......and no matter how much healing and bandaging and getting up again and again takes place.....if you look closely enough....you can still see the scars.....but.....onwards and upwards Jacko777.......who knows? Another time when we meet on this forum, I may be telling you all about my lovely new (well, second hand) air-conditioned car!!!.....cheers, Moonstruck

Health anxiety?

Chris_B — Thu, 05 Nov 2015 04:00:42 GMT

Hi everyone, this is a topic that comes up quite a bit on the forums. Below are some other threads you might want to check out:

Health anxiety and panic disorder

Health anxiety, a long lonely road

Severe health anxiety

Health anxiety - please help

Health anxiety

Health anxiety is taking over

Health anxiety disorder

Health anxiety by KatieNZ

Health anxiety?

mumpegg — Thu, 05 Nov 2015 08:21:47 GMT

Hi Mummybee,

newbie here too, I just joined today and I almost could have written your post myself. I have two young kids, 1 & 2 and I constantly convince myself I'm dying and they will grow up without a mother. It's all consuming and it's all I think about sometimes, right down to details of having to say goodbye etc etc.

Earlier this year it was cervical cancer, then I thought I had some sort of eye cancer and for the last two weeks I'm convinced I have bowel cancer. It started off as one symptom which I've seen a doctor about and now I just have dizziness, muscle weakness, back pain and fatigue which could either be low iron (further adding to my fears) OR is it the anxiety tricking me! I have another appointment tomorrow, but I know I'm just going to have to get a million tests done because I won't be able to calm down until I get to the absolute bottom of the problem.

I have only in the last couple of days admitted to myself that I have a serious problem and this is actually taking over my life. All I want to do is sit on the lounge and Google my symptoms. I have periods of saying to myself "NO snap out of it and enjoy your kids!" And then next minute I've gone back down again.

Whilst I hate hearing other people like you are having these same awful feelings, it's nice to know I'm not alone....

Health anxiety?

Mummybee — Fri, 06 Nov 2015 07:07:38 GMT

Hi mumpeg,

I am glad that my post made you feel a little less alone. It's horrible isn't it? All consuming is the best way I can describe it too!

my muscles felt so weak today so that had me in a spin about why these symptoms are lasting so long, how can my brain be doing this? All the questions start running...

my eyes felt dry, probably because of being so exhausted, straight away I'm googling dry eyes! There is something seriously wrong with me...

my muscles twitch all the time, the dr Google results of that are also terrifying!

good to hear I'm not the only one.

take care

mummybee

Health anxiety?

darthritis — Fri, 06 Nov 2015 14:13:08 GMT

Yep this is me too!

I've been doing it since I was a kid as a result of separation anxiety.

I'm constantly seeing specialists, trying (and kind of hoping) to find a medical diagnosis as the thought of it just being anxiety is scarier to me as there is no cure, just management.

Anxiety is pretty amazing in terms of how many physical symptoms it can present.

I bet we will both live to 100 thinking we're going to die at any second! haha

Health anxiety?

Mummybee — Tue, 10 Nov 2015 19:34:56 GMT

Hi mumpeg,

how are you doing? How did you go at the doctor?

i just woke up this morning with that horrible all consuming sense of dread... What symptoms will be there today, how weak will I feel? My stomach fills with dread and I struggle to face the day.

hope you're doing better

Health anxiety?

Dwwmills — Wed, 11 Nov 2015 13:04:38 GMT

Hello Mummybee.

Anxiety can be all consuming sometimes. I hate the way it
takes away your reasoning abilities. Sort of sneaks up on you and you find
yourself worrying about things that later, are less important. I find being
anxious about my health is particularly difficult to deal with. Getting older I
really do have some things I need to keep an eye on. It’s trying to keep these
things in perspective that can be difficult.

Waiting for a scan result or a test result can have my mind
racing away with all possible negative outcomes. I’ve found myself searching
the Internet for all the possible outcomes. The anxiety has me thinking about
all the worst possible outcomes and this finishes up making me even more
anxious. The best way I found so far of dealing with this is to say that I have
no way of influencing the outcome of the test or scan. Looking at all the
possibilities will not change the outcome one iota. I now set myself a limit of
time for looking on the net. Some research does help me have a more intelligent
conversation with the doctor. I then say to myself that I will be able to deal
with whatever turns up once I know what it is. Instead of wasting all this
energy worrying, I tried to put it to some good elsewhere, like tackling my
anxiety.

My experience with anxiety is that it is a thief. It robs
you of life now whilst you worry about things in the future, without you even
realising it. Your last line ”I’m so worried about being around to watch my
kids grow up.” Hits home for me. The anxiety itself could already be taking you
away from your kids. I don’t mean this as a personal criticism but as an
example of how I believe anxiety is a thief. I’ve had this happen myself and it
took me a while to realise that being mentally exhausted from worrying about my
health left less time and energy for me to give to my kids.

Does your doctor know about the levels of anxiety you are
experiencing? Talking to your doctor about it may start the process of tackling
your anxiety. I found things improved greatly after doing this myself as the
anxiety was a problem and not my health.

I wish you all the best.

Health anxiety?

Moonstruck — Fri, 13 Nov 2015 06:03:12 GMT

Jacko....last time we "met" just about a week ago I guess....I said "next time we speak on this forum, I may be telling you about my beautiful new (second hand) air cond. car"....guess what Jacko! a couple of days after that, I was offered the chance to buy (in my limited price range) a beautiful second-hand, air cond. automatic car with low mileage and absolutely immaculate and just checked over by the same mechanic who had delivered such bad news about my old one...which I knew had to be confined to the scrap heap!! It came out of the blue....my head is still spinning a bit with the swiftness of how quickly my visualisations were answered.....perhaps just writing those few words down to you.....made it "real" somehow.....our thoughts and written words are more powerful than we think!....just had to share that with you and my other new friends on the Forum...(I call her my Silver Lady...she is here with me now)........Cheers.

Health anxiety?

Jacko777 — Fri, 13 Nov 2015 11:20:27 GMT

Ha! Well that's funny! And terrific, I don't reckon I deserve any credit but happy to be a part of it! It definitely does help to write down your goals, have intention. I have been getting back into writing a daily list of things to do, not just chores, I try to get around to most of the important parts of my life each day with achievable goals.

Anyway, great stuff and thanks for letting us know!

Jack

Health anxiety?

mumpegg — Sat, 14 Nov 2015 05:42:42 GMT

Hi mummybee,

Thank you so much for thinking of me. I went a little offline for a week so apologies for the delay! I had my appointment and she referred me to a specialist....once I got the referral I started feeling silly and calmed down. Most of my symptoms dissapeared. I went to the specialist appointment though, expecting to just be told not to worry and he advised I need further investigation! So this Thursday I have a "procedure"

I'm absolutely so scared. Not of the actual thing itself but I just keep thinking that I'm going to be in the room with my husband and my daughters and the doctor is going to walk in and say I have cancer.

The specialist appointment was Thursday. It's Saturday afternoon and I feel like I can't breathe. Everything is coming back. It's ridiculous because I know it's the anxiety causing it but I can't calm down. I'm just so thankful this thing is only 5 days away so I can just get the bloody thing done and find out what's happening.

I hope you're going ok? Are you feeling any better than your last post? I honestly never worried like this.....it's kids, I just can't imagine leaving them.....and I appreciate your post dwwmills, it's true we are already leaving them by being so consumed with all of this, I just can't shut it off, especially with this test looming!

Health anxiety?

Dwwmills — Sat, 14 Nov 2015 07:17:09 GMT

Hello mumpegg.

I’m really sorry you have to go in for further testing. It
is really hard to switch off and I don’t know that I could in your situation.
It’s the uncertainty of not knowing and the lack of control. I’m glad you don’t
have to wait long.

I hope it all turns out well for you.

Health anxiety?

Dwwmills — Sat, 14 Nov 2015 07:37:10 GMT

Hi mumpegg.

Just another quick thought. I’ve had a few tests for things
that potentially would not have been nice to have. They have all so far come
out fine.

Doctors like to make sure they don’t miss a diagnosis. Your
procedure may be more likely to be happening to make absolutely sure that you
don’t have whatever they’re looking for. You may have a very small chance of
having whatever they’re searching for but they still need to do the test. What
I’m trying to say is that the doctor may be doing the test just to make
absolutely sure you don’t have whatever it is rather than them suspecting that
you do have it.

Good luck I will be thinking of you.

Health anxiety?

Mummybee — Sun, 15 Nov 2015 04:30:52 GMT

Hi Mumpegg,

sorry to hear your mind isn't at ease.

ill be thinking of you on Thursday. I'm sure it will be all fine, but I know that my say so won't make you feel better. Please let me know how you go.

my fear is MS. I've had a clear MRI but I'm still petrified I have it. I find a new symptom everyday, fixate on the tingle or the "feeling" and I google it and it always fits in with MS. I don't know how many times I can go to the dr before they call me crazy, or worse send me to a neurologist that will put me into massive panic mode.

anyway I'll be thinking of you.

Mummybee

Health anxiety?

Mummybee — Fri, 20 Nov 2015 03:17:03 GMT

Hi Mummpegg

I have been thinking of you

how did your tests work out?

Mummybee

Health anxiety?

oska — Fri, 20 Nov 2015 03:28:17 GMT

hi my name is oska I have been suffering from anxiety for five years I find it really hard im lucky I have family who are really supportive and a wonderful husband from this site I hope to get some more support from other people who can understand what im going through thank you

Health anxiety?

Moonstruck — Fri, 20 Nov 2015 04:04:20 GMT

Hi there Oska......i am sure you will find folk who understand anxiety.....there seem so many degrees of it and different kinds....most of the time I can hide it well....and this confuses people when I am longing to explain how "scared" I am of certain things and events...that seem harmless to them! they laugh and pass it off as just me being dramatic, or witty or something......e.g. (now this may seem funny to some) I am scared of my new car!! there you see, I bet some of you guys out there laughed! I know it sounds amusing...but i can't be bothered explaining to people that I have had for ages, an underlying Anxiety Disorder, which because I have conquered so well and managed to control.....they just don't believe me...so I don't bother explaining......it's a second hand car but Ive never had a "nice car" before.....its bigger than the last 30 year old one...so very nervous about parking, haven't driven at night in the dark yet...had to ask for help getting the clock, radio, etc going.....I am just "scared"....I have to psyche myself up sometimes to walk out, get in and confidently drive off....always masking my underlying fear....its so hard....I am a good driver.....i have to beat this...I cannot let this Anxiety stop me from enjoying what is a lovely new thing and event in my life......gee, it's hard isn't it...how can we just click our fingers and make the anxiety go away? stop being frightened?......best wishes Oska and to you all...