topic Lost in Anxiety

Lost

siliver_rat — Wed, 22 Jul 2015 00:15:28 GMT

Hi I am feeling very lost and anxious all the time. Any time I start to feel even a bit better my mind just thinks about possible bad things that may happen and back comes the anxious feeling. For most of my life I have been successful, had a good job, wife and one 18 year old daughter.

My daughter has had mild Anorexia very since a boy called her fat. Have been working through this and she is getting better. Moved school and just recently moved house to help - definite improvement in her state of mind. Moving house resulted in an increased mortgage and this unfortunately coincided with troubles at work. All of a sudden my job is under threat. I had some anxiety feelings before but now I just feel sick all the time, Cry for no reason, just want to curl up in a ball. I feel I am letting my family down, my confidence is shot everything is just dark.

I know people have a life a lot harder than mine and I should not be so sad but I cannot shake the feeling and for the first time in my life I do not know what to do.

Lost

romantic_thi3f — Wed, 22 Jul 2015 00:53:53 GMT

Hi siliver rat,

Thanks for reaching out to BB.

I'm sorry that things have been so tough for you lately and I'm really glad you posted. A lot of anxiety is about feeling lost and so you're definately not alone. I think as with anything the first step is just to recognise that something's not quite right. But the second step is always the hardest - getting help.

I think it was great of you to post on this forum and would really encourage you to seek out someone to talk to. Telling yourself to 'shake the feeling' of anxiety just won't work (believe me I've tried it myself). In order to really deal with your anxiety you need to try and deal with some of those thoughts popping in your head that are shooting your confidence down and suggesting bad things might happen. It's pretty amazing how much our thoughts have an impact on the way you feel - and challenging those thoughts can really help too. Are the thoughts you're having helpful? Are you thinking realistically? Are you acknowledging how great a dad you are? You said you felt like you were "letting the family down". Do you have any good reason for that? That's part of what therapy can help you do - and in turn you can feel a lot better about yourself.

🙂

Lost

Zeal — Wed, 22 Jul 2015 00:55:39 GMT

Hi Silver Rat,

I'm sorry to hear that you're experiencing anxiety at the moment. It sounds as though you have a loving family and good employment, which is great! I'm so glad your daughter has mostly recovered from her Anorexia. Unfortunately, there are many girls who are not able to. I had an eating disorder in my late teens. I'm healthy and happy now, at 22.

I can imagine an increased mortgage would be weighing on your mind. Are the troubles you're experiencing at work linked to your anxiety, or are they related to the company? Though having anxiety can feel like a weakness, it does not make a person weak or weak-willed. I have met and known some very strong people who have suffered from mental illness at a stage in their life. You seem to be putting a lot of pressure on yourself to provide for your family. It's great that you care so much about them and want the best for them, but you need to also recognize that you are doing the best you can at the moment.

I strongly urge you to make an appointment with your GP. You could show them this forum post, as a way to start off and to "break the ice". Your doctor can help you make plans to help manage your anxiety. If they deem it necessary, they can refer you to a counsellor or psychologist. Australian medical plans often now enable a certain number of counselling appointments to be either free or very low in cost.

Numerous people could say that there are others who have a harder life, or who are worse off. However, this does not mean that your situation (or their situation) does not deserve consideration or care. Your circumstances are unique, and you deserve to voice your concerns, and to seek help.

I hope you can start to make positive progress with your GP

Best wishes,