Unmotivated to help myself

Camir — Tue, 22 Sep 2015 08:51:25 GMT

As an individual i have been battling my depression/anxiety for about a decade and at the age of 26 it feels as though it has ruined everything in my life. I recently left a 5 year relationship upon realising how toxic it was for me, i can't seem to get my way through university without hating every second of it and i feel as though I'm sabotaging the last friendship i have. These are the years I'm truly meant to have grown into a respectable responsible person, these are the years i should have enjoyed and had fun, instead i feel like I've done nothing but waste them. As i sit here to write this i truly say that i hate myself for what i haven't done or achieved with the time granted to me. I am so unmotivated despite seeing someone who is trying to help me. There is only so long i can drag my last friend through my shit when all she tried to do is help me.

Currently, i am seeing a therapist who i have found to be quite helpful and understanding in comparison to others I've been to. As helpful as she is i cannot seem to put into place one set of homework i was given.

"find myself a social hobby in an effort to reduce social anxiety and stop absolute thinking. My absolute thinking takes form in how i perceive trying new things, and meeting new people".

I constantly feel confused as i have days where i really try hard and get things done, but then it seems i fall right back into old isolation type habits. Im not feeling the consequences of these days, i see them but i don't feel them. and it makes it very hard to get out of this situation I'm in.

A good example is my friend who is very frustrated with me at the moment because i have had 2 weeks off work to try improve my situation and I've done absolutely nothing. I am begging my friend not to give up on me even though it seems I've given up on myself. In the back of my mind i know that i will go to sleep tonight and wake up tomorrow and these feelings of guilt will be gone and i can just settle into my old ways again. Like i said, i see consequences but i don't feel them.

Please any advice would be so very appreciated. I'm not sure how long i can keep disappointing others and myself.

Unmotivated to help myself

JessF — Wed, 23 Sep 2015 01:18:09 GMT

Camir said:Currently, i am seeing a therapist who i have found to be quite helpful and understanding in comparison to others I've been to. As helpful as she is i cannot seem to put into place one set of homework i was given.
"find myself a social hobby in an effort to reduce social anxiety and stop absolute thinking. My absolute thinking takes form in how i perceive trying new things, and meeting new people".

Hello Camir, small steps are the key when faced with a task that feels overhwelming. The task above, for example. The first step would be to write down a list of things you might like to try as hobbies. Have you done this? You could start by doing it in this thread.

topic Unmotivated to help myself in Anxiety

Unmotivated to help myself

Unmotivated to help myself