topic Fearful of night time in Anxiety

Fearful of night time

Ellie05 — Tue, 17 Nov 2015 09:52:26 GMT

Hello,

I've been posting a lot here lately, mainly because it gives me a few minutes relief from the anxiety that currently consumes me.

I fear getting through each part of the day - the period before I have to leave for work, travelling to work, getting through the day and then getting through the evening. But the most scary time for me is night time. I've been talking to my mum about it and she said, 'it must be horrible to be all alone in the dark, feeling horrible'. She really hit the nail on the head. Night time is when my anxiety really runs wild as I'm too tired to have any control over my thoughts and there's little stimulus to distract me. I get little sleep and spend most of the time pacing around the apartment trying to ease the anxiety, going back to bed, having the anxiety flare up again and so forth.

It really sucks. That's all I have to say.

Fearful of night time

Wahoo42 — Tue, 17 Nov 2015 10:33:05 GMT

I know how you feel to a degree some of it i can relate too we just need to change our thinking pattern and get rid of the neg thoughts its hard but i guess it comes down to the flight or fight mode etc I'm sure there others out there who go thru similar to this love to hear how they deal with it too .......be strong

Fearful of night time

Simona — Tue, 17 Nov 2015 11:29:37 GMT

That is sad. I don't know what it's like to be alone at night because I have never lived alone.

Maybe get a kitten if possible. Because it's nice to have animals around even if it's just a jamjar fish to keep on your bedside table. I can't imagine life without animals around me. Our dog Bandicoot always knows when I'm feeling detached because she will just hop on my lap and want a pat or she will try and kiss me.

Ps- Jam jar fish = Siamese fighter fish

I hope I helped and I'm very sorry you are suffering

Fearful of night time

Mummybee — Wed, 18 Nov 2015 07:05:53 GMT

Hi Ellie05

i don't live alone so I can't relate there, but I can relate in the lack of distraction comment.

ill often wake very early or in the middle of the night while everyone else is asleep. I cannot get up, I would wake my husband and my kids. My anxiety is gripping in the dark with no distractions so I use my iPad.

as soon as I'm awake a grab it and play mind numbing games like candy crush to keep my mind off my thoughts. Sooner or later I feel my eyelids get heavy and I can drift off.

i don't know if this is an option for you, but i thought it might be worth sharing in case it helps you too.

thinking of you in this tough time

mummybee

Fearful of night time

Ellie05 — Wed, 18 Nov 2015 07:24:06 GMT

Hi Mummybee,

Unfortunately the anxiety is too intense for me to be able to focus on something like a game. I'm just going through a really bad couple of days and hoping it will ease up soon. Thanks for your support.

Fearful of night time

Ellie05 — Wed, 18 Nov 2015 07:27:41 GMT

Hi Simona,

Unfortunately I can't have pets in my apartment 😞

I do live with housemates, however they're both asleep through the night so I'm essentially on my own.

I'm hoping the sleepless nights will ease up soon.

Thanks for your support.

Fearful of night time

Ellie05 — Wed, 18 Nov 2015 07:29:15 GMT

Thank you for you support - it is hard. Changing my negative thoughts is going to be a long process, but I hope to get there with the help of my psychologist.

Fearful of night time

Mummybee — Wed, 18 Nov 2015 07:58:59 GMT

Ellie05

what are your negative thoughts based on at the moment?

mummybee

Fearful of night time

HelenM — Wed, 18 Nov 2015 10:47:01 GMT

Hi Ellie 05,

Firstly, my doctor allows me sleeping tabs 3 nights a week (mon. wed. fri.) that way I won't become dependent. Would that be of any help to you?

The other point: I develop different fears that usually go of their own accord. If you can make them go, that's good. Distraction (and I know that's not an option at night) is the only way I can get rid of them. I don't try to make them go because they just push harder and I feel I've failed. Everybody's different. We can't think physical pain away and I can't think mental pain away. That's how I see it anyway. My thoughts are linked to my mental illness.

I hope your problems ease. Mental anguish is so hard to handle.

Take care, Helen

Fearful of night time

Ellie05 — Wed, 18 Nov 2015 10:54:35 GMT

Hi Mummybee,

I have a lot of negative thoughts that keep me up at night. I think they come through in my dreams. I lost a job a few months back and that crushed my confidence. I also just started a new one and am nervous it won't work out. I've always been too anxious to date so I fear never finding a partner and having kids. I fear losing the people I love most as I know that's something I'll have to face someday. Our landlord just recently sold our place so I'm also worried about where to live.

Sometimes I don't think I'm having thoughts at all, the anxiety just seems to have taken on a life of it's own. It's got the point where I'm more fearful of the anxiety than anything else. I know this type of intense anxiety can't last forever and I'm already starting to improve. However when you're in the middle of it it's difficult to see that.

Fearful of night time

pipsy — Sat, 21 Nov 2015 06:49:26 GMT

Hi there. You poor thing. You sound as though you're really afraid of the dark, not silly, don't think that. Have you thought about getting a night light or Rock-Salt light. With the Rock-Salt, they are left 'on' 24/7. If you switch them off, they 'melt'. You could have maybe two, one in your lounge, one in your bedroom. They also give out a 'warmth' that will help relax you. In the summer, you don't notice the heat as they're not HOT, HOT. It's a gentle relaxing warmth, that will help you sleep. A night light, you can get led-lights which also give out an illumination, again, not enough to keep you awake, but if you wake, you wouldn't need the main light. Once you start to relax, sleep will come. Is your job quite stimulating, if that's the case, you need to 'unwind', the Rock-Salt is great for that. My friend lost her husband of 42 years a few years ago, her kids bought her one, she swears by it. Hope my suggestions help. If not, keep posting. Good luck.

Fearful of night time

Chicken_Wings — Sat, 21 Nov 2015 07:04:52 GMT

Oh Ellie I know that feeling of being scared of your fear so well.
I feel that weight on my chest and immediately worry that I'm about to be forced back into that black corner and it immediately makes things worse.
If you know the trigger and can do something about it then I know for me thats made a real difference in the past.

My sleep issue is that I lay down and want to sleep but I just start twitching and fidgeting and just can't get past that to sleep. For the nights when it's the worst, have you considered talking to your GP about having something you can take just to relax you (not a sleeping tablet). I've found that if I can just get myself to stop shaking I can relax and get to sleep. You may find that something like that would just help you relax enough to get to sleep and hopefully stay like that.

Fearful of night time

Bluey_moon — Sat, 21 Nov 2015 07:26:40 GMT

Hi Elle,

I don't live alone, but I do know what it is like to be afraid at night. When you are tired it is so much harder to deal with anxiety, in fact tiredness is one of my triggers!

Do you like listening to music? Could you get hold of some mindfulness or relaxation CDs , that could talk you through the worst of the anxiety?

I try breathing exercises, and often drift of to sleep doing that.

Do you have a craft or hobby you like? Drawing, colouring in? I find those colour in books good! Also jump on here, or the online chat or even call beyond blue. Sometimes having someone to talk to is helpful!

Skye

Is it the loss of the job and starting of a new job what has triggered the anxiety?

Fearful of night time

Ellie05 — Tue, 24 Nov 2015 11:34:50 GMT

Hi Bluey moon,

Thanks for your reply. The loss of my job triggered the anxiety but there were some underlying issues that I'd been ignoring for a long time (being focused on work mean't I could ignore these easier). I'm settling in slowly but am terrified of what might trigger a similar episode in the future.

Fearful of night time

Bluey_moon — Tue, 24 Nov 2015 11:47:34 GMT

Ellie,

It takes time to control the anxiety, so in that time try be kind to yourself. You are doing great.

Maybe take the time when you feel good to practice some skills to deal with the anxiety if/when it returns.

Each day is a victory!

Skye