topic How do I learn to trust the professionals? in Anxiety

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 08:56:17 GMT

I have GAD and a bit of OCD, my obsession at the moment (well has been for some months now), is me having schizophrenia. I have been told by a few professionals that i'm not! How do i learn to believe them in the long term?

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

blondguy — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 09:54:52 GMT

Hi Bluey

I have had GAD for a years and some OCD too. Its awful and sometimes too I think about Schizophrenia. Its awful and (in my humble opinion) you dont have schizophrenia as far as I can tell for two very good reasons

* You wouldnt be on here if you did

* The chemical/biological triggers dont let you think and articulate the way you do which is as 'normal' as I am!

Your professionals are right Bluey 🙂 Your words are strong and you speak from the heart....Nice1

(my brother had Schizophrenia...)

Be Gentle to Yourself and you are Legend by the way Bluey

Kindest Regards

Paul (Woof!)

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

blondguy — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 10:07:01 GMT

PS (sorry Bluey)

If its a tiny bit of help.....I dont always 'believe' my specialist......I listen .....yes....but then I can take it from there.If I may ask a question.....Are you currently working?

Kind thoughts

Paul

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 10:24:14 GMT

I am working Paul! And it helps to be honest!

i believe them, but I guess the way of it with anxiety is I think, what if I was having a good day, what if I forgot to tell them something, what if they missed something.

I worry incessantly about hearing voices, what if I start to? And often at night when people walk past I'll hear them but if I can't see them I freak out! And I argue with myself at lot lol, but it seems a lot of people on here do that!

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

blondguy — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 10:37:27 GMT

It was just a question Bluey....about working that is....sorry....

You are a legend on here...seriously and if you even had mild Schizophrenia it would be be very difficult for you maintain a job or what you have achieved on here....I meant what I said about my brother.....he had it and I saw all the symptoms......

BB is wonderful and being positive is what you and I do....But Im just being a 'positive realist'.....

Have you done your research about when Schizophrenia 'kicks in'? as in the age? You mentioned about 'that you worry incessantly about hearing voices' (Key word there is 'worrying' about hearing voices.....or do actually hear them like someone in the room')

Sorry about the blunt question (and you can ask me anything bye the way) but you are way too focused to be anywhere near remotely having Schizophrenia

Paul

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 11:10:38 GMT

Oh my I didn't mean to sound defensive, I just ment I find it helpful to work, distraction, you know!

I read the onset is slightly older in women (I'm 34 by the way).

Um, mostly I worry a lot! Never voices in the same room, when I descibed my inner dialogue to my psych, he said that was my inner voice, it is me arguing in my head, always my voice!

Did you ever worry you would get scizophrenia, does it run in your family. Please don't answer if it's too personal!

Thank you for your insight!

You are very kind

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

blondguy — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 12:09:15 GMT

Hey Bluey...Yes I do worry about Schizophrenia but I know that even though my brother had it...he couldnt function or articulate the way you or I do. This dreadful mental disorder usually 'kicks in' (please dont quote me even though I have researched it) from late teens to mid twenties.....due to the biochemistry in the brain. It isnt normally transferred genetically....that is very rare....I dont have it....just the GAD and some OCD. You are well out of the demographic to just 'become Schizophrenic'

What you did mention makes rock solid sense....its your inner voice.....I have the voice lol....always telling me what i should or shouldnt do....What my brother had was bad news.....the voices were real to him....and he actually acted out what the voices told him to do (extremely sad and tragic)

You dont have Schizophrenia Bluey....and its not too personal to ask by the way...that is what this site is meant to be about.....(i Think lol)

I worry all the time....same you lol.....its a real pain.....But it does show you have a kind and true heart Bluey...We just pay the price for having that big heart....Im getting used to it....:-)

I am actually relieved what you described to your psych......"your inner dialogue".....and he said "it was your inner voice"

I am actually more worried (doh!) about my GAD .....which i shouldnt by the way lol...than anything else...especially Schizophrenia.

You are way too 'collected' in your mind to be even thinking about the 'S' word (easier than spelling it lol...try 'I Go to Sleep by Sia.......Tranquility at its finest....

Kind Thoughts & Hugs

Paul (Woof!)

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 20:00:01 GMT

Hi Paul,

Firstly I would like to thank you, for your reassurance and your openness and your honesty!

I read your post at 1:30am, and for obvious reasons, didn't answer back at that time!

I was having a rough night and my reply wouldn't have been reflective of the way I really felt! i dreamt all night about the "s" word, and I would lay there concentrating hard to see if I was hearing voices! I know this is ridiculous, but my obsessive nature causes me to do this!

My heart breaks for your brother, he must have been very frightened!

Paul, thank you for sharing such personal experience with me and for your kind comments about me!

Skye

ps: I work in a pharmacy, not the best place for someone with health anxiety lol

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Sun, 17 Jan 2016 21:19:43 GMT

Hi Paul,

i talked to a person in the mental health team at our base yesterday! Again they are saying I don't have the "s" word! That its my anxiety confusing me!

But im having trouble believing them again! How do they know, what if they are missing something?

😞

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

White_Rose — Sun, 17 Jan 2016 21:42:08 GMT

Hello Skye

If I could just jump in here. Your comments and thoughts would resonate with so many other people here. Not because they are concerned about "s" but because what you experience is also felt as part of their feelings of unwellness, if there is such a word.

I worry about my inner voices, the ones that tell me how useless I am, how stupid etc. I have discussions with myself trying to sort out different problems. As your psych said, our inner dialogue or inner voice has a lot to say. I will add that's it's not always good because we do not have an outside voice to bring some logic into the discussion. I once tried writing down my conversation using my left and right hands as the two protagonists. It was an interesting conversation. I must try it again.

I also question the experts, usually after the event. What if... is a common way of thinking. But in the big diagnoses the doctors and psychs generally get it right. And remember you have had this reassurance from more than one person. Yes, one person may get it wrong, but not a number of people. So what does your psych suggest you do when you get a thought stuck in your head? Do you have ways of getting it out again.

Actually it sounds a bit like an ear worm. You know when you get song a song or similar stuck in your brain and can't get it out again. It does eventually fade away so I hope you manage to push this thought into the rubbish bin where it belongs.

Mary

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Sun, 17 Jan 2016 21:45:15 GMT

Thank you Mary for your reply! I just don't know!

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Dwwmills — Mon, 18 Jan 2016 06:44:50 GMT

Hi Skye.

I think there are two questions being asked here. The first one “How do I trust my health professional?” you have clearly stated. The unstated one “How do I not trust my own judgement on this one?” needs to be answered as well. I think once you have an answer for both of these you’ll be right.

This is something I found very difficult to do myself. We all go through life making decisions and trusting our judgement to get us through so there’s no wonder it’s difficult to then trust someone else’s judgement over your own. I manage this at times by looking at the problem as if it was somebody else’s. In my case a highly skilled professional told me I had GAD. It didn’t feel like it to me but if I heard anyone else get that diagnosis I would believe the professionals opinion over the patient’s. Looking at it from this perspective I decided that for this one thing I was going to accept the professional’s opinion over my own. I didn’t have to believe every other thing the professional told me but for this one thing I accepted they knew what they were talking about. From then on whenever I had doubts I would treat these doubts as anxiety surfacing. I would go away and break down these thoughts and challenge them and replace them with more rational beliefs. I had to ignore my gut feelings and see them as just my anxiety.

Your situation is slightly different as you are trying to see something as not being real where I was doing the reverse. It will still come down to believing your professional health provider over your gut feelings. Have they given you any strategies for tackling this?

Cheers

Dean

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Mon, 18 Jan 2016 07:48:42 GMT

Hi Dean,

again your advice is invaluable!

I don't know how to trust myself anymore (sorry I'm crying). I'm just scared and afraid, and everyday I think of something else that I might have forgot to tell them, today I was arguing with my inner voice again, one saying I'm dumb ect. And this morning half dreaming hearing conversation, but it the context of the dream! I want to ring them and ask, is this normal??? But they'll be mad and frustrated, with good reason! So I on line chatted with a BB person but I finished feeling more crazy!

I have to learn to trust I'm just scared and I don't know how anymore!

I want to be a good wife and a good mum, but right now I feel like a failure!

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Mon, 18 Jan 2016 23:21:44 GMT

So I have made a plan.

i wrote down all my "symptoms", and mental health are going to ring me back, then I'm going to tell them everything I percieve and I will accept their final word, no matter what! No more phone calls, no more reassurance seeking!

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Dwwmills — Tue, 19 Jan 2016 01:41:04 GMT

Hi Skye.

Sorry things are a bit tough for you at the moment but you don’t have to worry about being a failure. You clearly are a very thoughtful, intelligent and caring person. Anyone reading your posts can see this. You are just suffering from anxiety and some OCD. To your credit you are in there trying to sort things out which shows a lot of courage.

When I realise that my view of the world was not necessarily right I found this unsettling. What got me through was trusting in my underlying attributes as a person not necessarily my thinking abilities at the time. I had to put my trust in the processes I was given by my psychologist (mainly CBT). I didn’t trust this process blindly I assessed it as I went along and varied it in partnership with my psychologist so that it fitted my circumstances.

I think it’s good that you are making a plan to talk to your health care workers. Doing something for me always made things better as doing nothing and feeling trapped made me feel worse.

OCD can make getting thoughts out of your head and changing track quite difficult. My daughter had severe OCD many years ago and I have seen how difficult it can be. I think this may be causing you to look for more symptoms than is really necessary. Your health professionals have had plenty of time to look at you and assess the situation, so trust their judgement. You don’t have schizophrenia. To use an analogy it’s like trying to describe an elephant to somebody. You start by saying it’s a very big four-legged mammal, it has a long trunk, big ears, tasks, is grey and wanders around in herds. Most people by this stage have worked out that it is an elephant. You could go on to describe many other details such as how many toes, what it eats and how it smells but this will make no difference to the end result. It’s still an elephant.

When you talk to your health professionals see if they have some strategies to help deal with the obsessive thoughts.

If this is any consolation I found that the tough times was when I learned the most about my anxiety.

Cheers

Dean

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Tue, 19 Jan 2016 01:57:40 GMT

Dean I don't know what to say except thank you!

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Tue, 19 Jan 2016 07:02:25 GMT

Btw, I've been told again I don't have "s" word. Just anxiety, OCD and intrusive thoughts!

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

blondguy — Fri, 22 Jan 2016 13:47:45 GMT

Hi Skye

It looks like Dean and Mary are spot on here. I remember what it was like to 'Try to Figure Out' what the hell was going on with the anxiety.....So I will keep this brief.....The 'S' word......nope....you dont even come close.....but the anxiety yes....you do...and all of those intrusive thoughts the same as we all get...and they are awful...however they do decrease over time after you so sick and tired of them they actually (sometimes) can become boring..seriously

It doesnt mean much right now but please be 'Gentle To Yourself'

Kind Thoughts

Paul

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Sun, 24 Jan 2016 01:52:11 GMT

Thank you everyone for your advice!

im getting there slowly, the mornings are the worst!

Today laying on the bed I could hear a women faintly, then I realised my husband was playing music, so I was calm, a few weeks ago I couldn't do that!

Skye

How do I learn to trust the professionals?

Bluey_moon — Sun, 24 Jan 2016 02:31:20 GMT

You see what I used to do is if I heard any snipet of conversation or voice, usually from outside ect I would panic, even though i coulndt hear anything they were saying. If I could see the source I'd be releived, if I coulsnt I'd be so scared I was hearing things! But I've been told it's part of anxiety and I'm starting to beleive it, my brain is just so sensitive to that sort of thing! Wereas anyone else wouldn't think twice about it!