topic Re: Who am I in Welcome and orientation

Who am I

Bill of Silence — Mon, 30 Jan 2023 10:46:54 GMT

Hello BB Forums,

I am 61 years old and all of a sudden alone. Not that that bothers me too much. But when my father passed away in 2017 and since then I have been fighting hostile siblings and false claims that I am legally with mental health conditions.

I have been fighting to keep my sanity and anxiety attacks away by finding distractions in life. I sometimes build plastic models or even play games on my PC. What is strange by avoiding those that are hostile, I wonder whom has the mental health issues.

Having learned that anxiety can destroy you in more ways than one thinks. I stopped walking and talking to people. The hardest things are to pick up the pieces and move on.

kind regards,

Bill of Silence

Re: Who am I

white knight — Mon, 30 Jan 2023 14:56:37 GMT

Hi Bill, welcome

Moving on, yes, hard. So, briefly, had 4 long term relationships and found there is a streak of narcissism in the female side of the family hence parted ways with my now 91yo mother 12 years ago that had a history of ruining my weddings and triangulation of loved ones. Just last xmas a similar event with my sister has seen a parting of ways there also as I wont tolerate anyone that is cruel enough to recruit their adult children to gang up on family members.

So, moving on? I decided many years ago that "family" was not necessarily blood. That opened up a large range of possibilities that was a move against hanging onto family members that were acting not in my interest, in fact were destroying me as a person. It ranged further than what I thought- my youngest daughter adopted the same weaponising using silence as her mother did. It was torture talking one minute and blocking me the next. How could one disown their child- well I did and along with my mum and sister it could look like I have the problem yes?

Well my family does have bipolar, borderline and depression as base illnesses which doesnt help however we should protect ourselves especially our own mental health as much as possible.

I want to suggest that your selection of friends and quasi family is in need of an overhaul. That will require a new and easy to develop method of scanning/testing others for their levels of empathy and interest in you. Here is the idea in this thread

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/relationship-and-family-issues/fortress-of-survival/td-p/216226

there's also part 2 and 3, look for them on google.

I'd be interested in your thoughts.

TonyWK

Re: Who am I

Mark Z. — Mon, 30 Jan 2023 18:55:40 GMT

Hi Bill,

I'm very sorry for your challenge.

It might be a good idea to keep distance with your hostile siblings, however, I wouldn't suggest you to stop walking and talking to other people. Because you do need to do right things for your own physical and mental health, including going to the nature, doing regular exercise, chatting with your friends, doing things you love, etc. Don't isolate yourself, just avoid toxic people.

Hope everything will be better.

Mark

Re: Who am I

Bill of Silence — Fri, 03 Feb 2023 03:08:06 GMT

Thanks for the responses. But on Wednesday my hostile half-sister had me arrested. I was placed in a Holding Cell for over an hour until I was charged. So, I got a date to appear in court, and hiring 2 solicitors to take care of her allegations.

All my friends agree it is to stop her in her tracks, before she puts me in prison just for defending my inheritance my late father left me. I am out on Bail and not going to let it stop me enjoying life.

moving on in life and putting an end to what is happening. Going out for a meal tonight with friends and sorting all my papers out for the solicitors next week.