topic New Here, Hows everyone? in Welcome and orientation

New Here, Hows everyone?

BabyRabbit — Mon, 11 Nov 2019 16:00:19 GMT

Hi everyone, I just ran down this rabbithole and found this forum during a tough moment trying to find support. Thought I give this a try, hows everyone and there experience on here?

New Here, Hows everyone?

geoff — Mon, 11 Nov 2019 20:28:45 GMT

Hello BabyRabbit, thanks for posting your comment.

I'm terribly sorry that you are having these problems, but pleased you have found this site because there are so many different people who have experienced some sort of depression and unfortunately some are still struggling such as what you are doing.

I hope you feel comfortable telling us a little more, we will try our best to help you through this.

Take care.

Geoff.

New Here, Hows everyone?

Aaronsis — Mon, 11 Nov 2019 22:19:10 GMT

Welcome BabyRabbit

I am so happy to hear that in your time of need you have found us here, we are here to listen and to support you in what ever you feel comfortable in sharing and talking about, we are here to listen and to give you some strength.

I found this site in my time of need and I can honestly say that I am where I am today as a result of this community. People who I don't even know reaching out to share and to explain their story and to offer a hug and an ear to listen.

When you feel ready I would love to know some more about your story if you would like to share.

Hugs to you BabyRabbit.

New Here, Hows everyone?

Mattyy — Tue, 12 Nov 2019 00:20:33 GMT

Hello BabyRabbit, first time using this website. I'm new here. Been going through horrible times these past months. By the way, I saw a tip about posting threads and mentioned stick to one thread or connect with already made threads. So I stumbled upon yours. Oh and hello to the community.

New Here, Hows everyone?

Aaronsis — Tue, 12 Nov 2019 00:37:39 GMT

Hello Mattyy and it is so wonderful for you to join in and support BabyRabbit too.

I just wanted to say Mattyy that you are more than welcome to start your own thread too, as well as jump in on anyone else's threads to offer support and comfort if you can, that is what this wonderful community is all about.

Hope to chat to you some more too Mattyy

New Here, Hows everyone?

geoff — Tue, 12 Nov 2019 14:30:51 GMT

Hello Mattyy, welcome to the forums.

If you start your own thread then you won't get lost in someone else's and people will be able to provide the help you may need directly.

It's much easier to see if any other comments have been made if you have already replied.

Geoff.

New Here, Hows everyone?

BabyRabbit — Thu, 14 Nov 2019 12:12:27 GMT

Hey there, thanks for replying Geoff.

Short story, I was diagnosed when I was younger with depression and anxiety. More like social aspects. It was hard to deal with even when I had help then from professionls, but since I've been able to keep my panic attacks at bay. But recently due to finishing studies and quitting an unfitting job and bouncing around try find another job and no luck. I've been pretty depressed and just even linking up with job recruitment agencies they messed me around some didn't even take me on. Not to mention the time wasting interviews. Like seeing where all my friends are at finishing studies at uni and having a grip on there personal life. It's got me so down lately. Not a dramtic situation but yeah it's been a real bummer but mentally doing 50/50.

New Here, Hows everyone?

BabyRabbit — Thu, 14 Nov 2019 12:16:07 GMT

Hey Mattyy, Welcome. Im new here too and pretty much my second time login on.

I'm sadden to hear you say that. If you wish, would you wana share you story with us 🙂

New Here, Hows everyone?

geoff — Thu, 14 Nov 2019 14:11:11 GMT

Hello BabyRabbit, thanks for getting back to us.

One problem I suppose we have done ourselves in life is to compare ourselves with our friends, it could in sport or what we received as Xmas presents, how come they are taller than me, or got a date before I did, this comparison with your friends 'getting a grip on life' doesn't mean anything, because what's to say in 5 years time their personal life may have crashed and yours is coming along precisely as you want.

Take a step aside and concentrate on doing what you want to do.

Don't compare your life to what others are doing because that aren’t your own and their circumstances could be completely different.

Take care.

Geoff.

New Here, Hows everyone?

Aaronsis — Thu, 14 Nov 2019 23:49:31 GMT

Hey BabyRabbit

Great that you have shared how you are feeling and it is so tricky being a young adult, having finished school, then uni, now what, what are my friends doing, why am I not as successful as them....so many things and expectations of life and success.

I feel like it is perfectly ok to, well not know and just take some time to figure that out. You have spent time studying and being at school and well now it might be time to take some chill out time and just stop and look around and just see what is it you do want to do. You may not figure that out right away and that is ok too.

It is so hard not to compare and I get it, to a certain degree it keeps us in check but mostly we are comparing to what people want us to see also, just cos they are smiling and happy does not mean they are ..as you well know, so sometimes we spend so much time looking at others we forget to look at ourselves.

I am 44 and still am figuring out what I want to do in life, there really is no time and no rules, it just happens as we go along and I think. It is hard to find a job these days and so many doors slam in your face, however it is having the strength to keep opening those doors knowing that they may slam..BUT..they also may not...we have to keep trying and getting back up. Your role will come.

Hope you have something today that makes you smile.

Hope to chat some more

New Here, Hows everyone?

Mattyy — Fri, 15 Nov 2019 22:12:52 GMT

Hey BabyRabbit, yes I will share my story with you. I too have been diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety. This all started in year 10. All my life I have been bullied, criticized, being put down and not standing up for myself ever since kindergarten.......I was very much a loner my whole life....not until my friend found me sitting alone on the seats.....she and I are the best of friends.....every single recess and lunch we would race to get the big volleyball court before someone else.....and from the we were playing hand ball at a volleyball court....it was fun. This was in primary. However, in high school....I was pretty much a damn loner....not until year 10 it was that another new girl found me and asked me if I wanted to hang out with her and her friends during recess and lunch.....and I said yes. And from there...that's when it all began. I was pretty much friends with only girls my entire life....I'm 19 years old....I barely cannot talk to guys (males) because I have a feeling they might bully me or judge my actions. So yeah I'm hopeless in becoming friends with guys. However....I eventually had a guy friend that I met through my best friend at someones birthday party. Fast forward 5 months, him and I are very close.....his starting to call me as if I am his family "You are my family"......and he wanted me to hang out with his mates so i can have a different group of friends rather than girls.....however when I do so.....I eventually stay really quite....not talking to them unless they talk to me....like i get panic attacks and I can feel my heart beating so fast....As much as I want to be friends with them.....I hopeless....they have accepted me into their group, they are nice people.....however I cant accept myself.....pretty much I'm useless in making friendships with guys.

New Here, Hows everyone?

Mattyy — Fri, 15 Nov 2019 22:42:47 GMT

Hey there BabyRabbit, don't compare yourself to others or your friends. I have done that multiple times and it made me even more terrible......affecting me mentally.....what I do is that I just don't care. Your feeling this way because your alone.....I understand and can relate to you so much....I too have been struggling to find a job....even if its just part-time or casual so that I can gain experience and get out of my comfort zone.....but i have no luck....my applications keep getting rejected.....I get that your feeling that way because I have felt that way.....and as a result it made me even more alone and isolated. I would suggest that you should go out, do some volunteering perhaps because recruiters love to see community volunteer work rather than what experience you have....you can make new friends through volunteering....go out for a walk or gym....I find that it really helps me not to think of others and lets you focus on yourself.

New Here, Hows everyone?

Aaronsis — Mon, 18 Nov 2019 07:52:17 GMT

Hey Mattyy

So great that you have shared your story and I am so very very sorry that your school experience was also filled with bullying and criticism, just so hurtful and so not necessary and I just dont understand to be honest. I am so glad that both of those beautiful girls approached you and that the male friend you have made calls you family, you know, it is so much better to have one friend like that than 100 fake ones.

I get what you are saying that you are now left with some much anxiety and that it is so hard for you to make friends with males and I just want to ask you....does it matter?? The fact that this new friend calls you family means he values you and appreciates so and wants you in his life and I get that you feel scared as to what has happened in the past, but I really think that you can trust your friend with your feelings and perhaps chat to him about this and just let him know do feel a bit anxious sometimes in social situations with the guys, I am sure he will work to help you feel comfortable, he sounds awesome.

I am so glad that you have opened up and shared your story and I hope you continue to chat here, you can even make your own thread if you like.

Hi to you too BabyRabbit, hugs to you both