topic I Don't Think I'm Straight (How Can I Tell?) in Welcome and orientation

I Don't Think I'm Straight (How Can I Tell?)

Internally_Sassy — Thu, 02 Apr 2020 05:13:25 GMT

Hello everyone!

I am questioning my sexuality but all the advice from I have found online, on discovering one's sexuality, has been based on people who have had a crush or have been in a relationship with someone before. I have no experience with either but I have a feeling (not sure if that's quite how to describe it) that I'm not straight. Whenever I think about being with either gender I don't feel a pull towards one gender more than the other. I was thinking I may be bi or pan.

Could anyone who can give advice on how I may be able to discover my sexuality, or maybe just share their own stories, I would greatly appreciate it.

I Don't Think I'm Straight (How Can I Tell?)

jess334 — Thu, 02 Apr 2020 10:11:04 GMT

Hi Internally Sassy,

Welcome to the forum community!

I'm not sure that I have an answer for you. I knew I was bi because I am sexually attracted to men and women.

I guess I didn't discover that until I was about 15/16. Before then I wasn't really attracted to anyone.

It's also ok if it takes you a while to figure out! I didn't come out to my family until my 20s. And now that I have been in a long term relationship with a man for almost 8 years, I think they have forgotten or assumed it was a phase. Lol.

Hopefully someone with more experience posts soon with something helpful.

Jess

I Don't Think I'm Straight (How Can I Tell?)

Katyonthehamsterwheel — Thu, 02 Apr 2020 14:48:20 GMT

Hi there

I have to agree with Jess in saying it's ok if you're not sure yet (or ever). I guess I'm pan, but I'm not even clear as I don't particularly like labels either - but if anyone finds them helpful then that's ok too. I just sort of realised that I was into people's vibes, rather than "you're this or that".

All the best. Love your profile pic 🙂

Katy

I Don't Think I'm Straight (How Can I Tell?)

hob2 — Sun, 05 Jul 2020 15:58:59 GMT

similar to U , i always wondered

Now i think it after lifetime of "switching" i decided IT doesnt really matter,

matters to U only; as neither "sides" can really understand !

I Don't Think I'm Straight (How Can I Tell?)

Internally_Sassy — Thu, 01 Oct 2020 05:34:39 GMT

Thank you all for answering. I will just wait and see I guess. Perhaps, in the meantime, I will look more into what each label encompasses so I feel more comfortable in identifying myself.

I Don't Think I'm Straight (How Can I Tell?)

MissRanga — Tue, 13 Oct 2020 03:02:46 GMT

Hey Sassy,

I feel your post so hard. While I knew I was Bi at an early age, I have many friends who have been through this path of not able to identify themselves.

From what you are posting I can firmly tell you are part of the LGBT+ community and welcome!

It is perfectly fine not to know the actual form of your sexual identity and many people don't know until much much later.

It does sound as if you could be Bi, Pan, maybe even Ace.
I would definitely recommend looking up definitions to see what you relate to but don't feel worried if they don't feel right. What's important is that you accept the feelings you have and don't be hard on yourself on this journey. Also something to be aware of is that there can be a difference between your sexual identity and romantic identity. E.g. bisexual is different to biromantic.

I would definitely recommend some research into different terminology to help you on your journey and good luck!

With Love,
Miss Ranga

I Don't Think I'm Straight (How Can I Tell?)

the black rabbit — Wed, 21 Oct 2020 07:27:14 GMT

Hi sassy

I’m bi, find out About my sexuality not to long ago,

I See what you’re saying, and I feel you. Judging by what you’ve said, you previously thought that you were just straight, but now that you have feelings Not just for One gender but as for for another as well, you feel confused and that you’ve lost touch with you’r self.

my advise is, just go with the flow.

don’t worry about, no need to stress, if you’re worried that you won’t be same person again, have a look at you’r past, how different is it? if you take a closer look it’s probably wasn’t. If you’r worried about what people might think of you, It’s probably There fault for being to inherit.

there’s no reason to be ashamed about loving someone who Is same gender as you, there’s nothing unnatural about it

Hope you’re doing well. Take care.

the black rabbit.

I Don't Think I'm Straight (How Can I Tell?)

Helarctus — Sun, 25 Oct 2020 23:54:11 GMT

Depending on where you source your research there are at least 46 sexual orientations (between 64 genders); so some confusion is entirely reasonable.

You are you, sex is a thing you may do, it is the who and why you do it with one person or/and another that is more important.

As long as you are comfortable and all the participants are consenting adults then what/who/how you do the thing should be a good experience. Communicate with the person(s) of interest, find out more about them, what they like or don't and try to do the same yourself. There will be hiccups and there is no obligation to go further than your comfortable.

If someone you are not attracted to tells you they are into you, that is a complement, thank them for it and be honest about how you feel and they will appreciate that so you can both move on.

Internally Sassy said:

Hello everyone!

I am questioning my sexuality but all the advice from I have found online, on discovering one's sexuality, has been based on people who have had a crush or have been in a relationship with someone before. I have no experience with either but I have a feeling (not sure if that's quite how to describe it) that I'm not straight. Whenever I think about being with either gender I don't feel a pull towards one gender more than the other. I was thinking I may be bi or pan.

Could anyone who can give advice on how I may be able to discover my sexuality, or maybe just share their own stories, I would greatly appreciate it.

I Don't Think I'm Straight (How Can I Tell?)

DJay___ — Sun, 11 Apr 2021 06:19:09 GMT

Hi,how are you?
For me, I too wondered where I fit in in my sexuality. I have a XXY chromosome so feel male and female, some days one or the other or sometimes, all in same day.
After learning about my condition, I did research on it and sexuality. After years the internet came through about 15 yrs back. I discovered I was pansexual. I tried experiences with a variety of people, trying to gauge who I should be with,male, female transgender and transvestite. I discovered I had no preference for anyone, however being in a straight relationship is hard when you have experienced what its like to be with other genders.
My advice is to first, accept who you are. Second, meet some people through a chat site or online dating site. This is challenging but for me was best thing to do. I had to discover who and what I am. I'm 50 yrs of age now, struggle with anxiety but I know who I am. Lucky I have my family's support and acceptance. If you would like to discuss more, let me know.
Kind regards, Djay**